Irrationality: a double bladed trick of the mind

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Next week is Spring Break and all campuses are closed.  I’m posting next week’s blog early since I won’t have access to a computer until the following week.

I made the first step in restoring communications with some people I wish I’d never lost touch with. It’s a rare day these past few years that I didn’t think about them and the impact they had on my life. At first it was a case of not noticing how communication was slipping. Then I realized that at some point, I had not written or called for nearly a year. At that point, my irrational side made itself known. The internal conversation went something like this:

“I haven’t written in a while. I should probably do that.”

“It has been a long time. They’re probably angry. You don’t want to make them angrier, do you?”

“Are you saying that getting in touch with them will make them angrier than they were when I stopped communicating?”

“Yes.”

“………”

At this point paralysis and inertia kick in and communication continued to lapse. Ladies and gentlemen, my irrational side. (no applause necessary)

As time went on, I felt worse about it. Then I started building walls around that part and tried to ignore it. As it happened, my irrational side got me into this, an irrational event broke the barrier. I got a piece of spam from one of the people I’d lost contact with. Spam is everywhere, so why was this an irrational event? First, he never initiates contact. Getting email from him before I sent one first is an unimaginable event. Second, it was spam. More specifically, someone had hacked into his system and started using his email list to send links to spoofed websites. Despite the email being spam, my irrational side’s little brother started jumping up and down with joy. “He emailed me first!”

I didn’t know if anyone else had let him know, so I emailed him back to tell him his account had been hacked. Then, I added a brief here’s-what-I’m-currently-up-to message and sent it off. The next day, I get a response with no text in the body, but the subject read: thanks for keeping in touch. Irony or sincerity? With him it could be either. Time will tell.

Precision Language

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I love coming upon new words as I read. I came upon a new one, today: dilatory. It refers to being slow or lazy. So why not say ‘slow’ or ‘lazy’? In most instances, I probably would. But when it comes to characterization, I tend to look for ways to make each character sound unique. Vocabulary is probably the easiest for me.

I’ve been called to task for using words that the reader doesn’t understand. I understand the reasons for such a critique. Anything that could draw your reader out of the world you’re creating is usually to be avoided. My personal viewpoint, however, is that it is better to use the appropriate word, not the easiest word.

The downside is that I tend to use these words in everyday conversation, often without realizing it. Worse, I use them without realizing that not everyone enjoys language like I do. I’m occasionally afraid that I come off as pretentious or patronizing. Nothing could be further from the truth. I don’t use vocabulary to show off, I use vocabulary to communicate.

I’ve been told (multiple times) I’m very precise in how I speak. It’s not something I really focus on. I focus on the message and what words best communicate that message. I have a decently large vocabulary, so I use it.

That said, ‘dilatory’ probably won’t appear much in my speech. It seems to be mostly associated with attitude rather than a state of being. I’m far more likely to end up using ‘desultory’.